It's been a long week...
Many things has happened...
Lost to SJI 5-0...
I got 12 for my CA...
N i have promise myself never to be desperate anymore...
Now,i have learned how to control myself...
Learned how to be patient...
For you i will do anything,just to get through to you...
One day, i will muster all my confidence...
I think for me now...
My happiest day will be the day when i die...
I hope it will be tomorrow...
Coz i can't bear this pain anymore...
I'm too tired...
I'm too exhausted...
Maybe...
I should just take a gun and shoot myself in the head...
Maybe...
The reason is you...
You are the reason why i feel so desperate...
I'm searching for the answer right now...
Searching for the impossible answer...
Uda lama ga update blog...
Nothing important happened these days...
Except that the fact that VS has been ousted from National tournament...
I'm quite sad that time...
Makes me down till now...
Then she's kept bothering my mind...
Can't really takes my eyes off of her...
Mungkin gw terlalu pede...
mungkin gw terlalu egois...
mungkin gw terlalu naif...
Dan mungkin gw terlalu kiasu...
Hahaha...
Untuk pertama kalinya gw ketawa...
Memank benar kata bohay...
Setelah diceramahin...
Gw baru sadar...
I think the best way for me right now is let the time flow...
As many people had told me to cheer up, i will cheer up...
PS: Thanks to y'all that help me to overcome my desperateness... Thanks a lot...
walking beside you @ 1:07 AM
Saturday, March 24, 2007
Staring out at the rain with a heavy heart
It's the end of the world in my mind
Then your voice calls me back like a wake up call
I've been looking for the answer
Somewhere
I couldn't see that it was right there
But now I know what I really know
Because you live and breathe
Because you make me believe in myself when nobody else can help
Because you live, girl
My world has twice as many stars in the sky
It's alright, I survived, I'm alive again
Cuz of you, made it through every storm
What is life, whats the use if you killed inside
I'm so glad I found an angel
Someone
Who was there when all my hopes fell
I wanna fly, looking in your eyes
Because you live and breathe
Because you make me believe in myself when nobody else can help
Because you live, girl
My world has twice as many stars in the sky
Because you live, I live
Because you live there's a reason why
I carry on when I lose the fight
I want to give what you've given me always
Because you live and breathe
Because you make me believe in myself when nobody else can help
Because you live, girl
My world has twice as many stars in the sky
Because you live and breathe
Because you make me believe in myself when nobody else can help
Because you live, girl
My world has everything I need to survive
Because you live, I live, I live
~Because You Live~ by Jesse McCartney
PS: Because you live, my world changed upside down...
I can't think clearly...
I act like i am a crazy guy...
You really drive me crazy,girl
You will be the first and the last one that can do it...
walking beside you @ 11:29 PM
Monday, March 19, 2007
Sitting here counting the hours
Waiting for the sun to kiss the sea
Paralyzed by the fragrance of the flowers
They remind me of you and me
Chorus
There's one love in a lifetime
Our two hearts of a kind
These three reasons you'll be mine
For when five and six are through
Seven days without you, Seven days without you.
Making plans just to stop the aching
Chasing thoughts from a million miles away
Hypnotized as another dawn is breaking
I rehearse the words I want to say
There's one love in a lifetime
Our two hearts of a kind
These three reasons you'll be mine
For when five and six are through
Seven days without you, Seven days without you
Well I will find a way into your heart
So let me try and sleep before we know
There's one love in a lifetime
Our two hearts of a kind
These three reasons you'll be mine
For when five and six are through
Seven days without you, Seven days without you
~Seven Days Without You~ by: Teddy Geiger
PS: Seven days without you seems to be a year for me...
walking beside you @ 9:03 PM
Saturday, March 17, 2007
It's Saturday...
My life seems to change...
I can laugh...
I can smile...
I can make a joke...
Maybe i should say thanks to those who has helped me to overcome my problem...
I would rather not mention their names...
For their privacy...
or rather my privacy...
Hahaha....
Soon,national tournament will come...
If i win, i will give the trophy to you...
Juz wait if i can give it to you or not...
I miss you...
walking beside you @ 11:11 PM
Wondering the streets, in a world underneath it all
Nothing seems to be, nothing tastes as sweet
As what I can't have
Like you and the way that you're twisting your hair
round your finger
Tonight I'm not afraid to tell you
What I feel about you.
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
and cannon ball into the water
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
For you I will
For you I will
Forgive me if I stutter
From all of the clutter in my head
Cuz I could fall asleep in those eyes
Like a water bed
Do I seem familiar, i've crossed you in hallways
a thousand times, no more camouflage
I want to be exposed, and not be afraid to fall.
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
And cannon ball into the water
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
For you I will
You always want what you can't have
But I've got to try
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
For you I will
For you I will
For you I will
For you
If I could dim the lights in the mall
And create a mood I would
Shout out your name so it echos in every room
I would
That's what I'd do, That's what I'd do to get through to you
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
And cannon ball into the water
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
For you I will
You always want what you can't have
But I've got to try
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
For you I will
For you I will
For you I will
For you I will
~For You I Will~ by Teddy Geiger
For you i will wait no matter how long it will take...
walking beside you @ 2:36 AM
Thursday, March 15, 2007
Verse 1
And I'd give up forever to touch you
Cause I know that you feel me somehow
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be
And I don't want to go home right now
Verse 2
And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
Cause sooner or later it's over
I just don't want to miss you tonight
Chorus
And I don't want the world to see me
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
Verse 3
And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming
Or the moment of truth in your lies
When everything seems like the movies
Yeah you bleed just to know your alive
Chorus
And I don't want the world to see me
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
Chorus
I don't want the world to see me
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
~Iris~ by Goo Goo Dolls
walking beside you @ 11:17 PM
I feel that i am a small guy...
Who walks in a big,big world...
With lots of challenges and disturbance...
I feel if i can overcome the challenges and disturbances...
I will be very happy...
The tougher the challenge, the more happiness i will get if i can overcome it...
So for you... I will wait patiently... Though it's hard... Coz it will become a challenge for me...
I will wait u no matter how long it will take...
A day,a month,a year,a decade,or even a millenium...
I will wait 4 u...
I make a decision...
I hope it will be a good one...
PS: I won't be desperate anymore...
walking beside you @ 11:10 PM
Wednesday, March 14, 2007
Mungkin takdir ini
terlanjur menuntut
diriku tak dapat pergi darimu
Walaupun seribu bintang tinggalkan ku
dan mentari tak bersinar
aku tak kan mampu untuk lepaskanmu
mencoba sejenak lupakan
segalanya yang tlah terjadi
CHORUS:duhai cinta
tataplah aku disini tetap menatapmu
walau perih
terus kau sakiti hati tetap mengharapmu
mungkin benar bila aku tak berarti
dan dirimu terlalu berarti
walaupun pekatnya bulan gelapkan ku
dan pelangi tak berpijar
wajahmu terlalu indah tuk ku benci
dan ku terus mencintaimu
engkau terus melupakanku
duhai cinta
tataplah aku disini tetap menatapmu
walau perih
terus kau sakiti hati tetap mengharapmu
repeat chorus
~Kubenci kau dengan cintamu~ by Titto
walking beside you @ 11:35 PM
Another day has passed...
2 hari ini agak sedikit suram...
Kerjanya cuman mugging...
Tapi hari ini AGAK sedikit berbeda...
Diajak nonton Paris J'taime, tapi syg NC16. Terpaksa nonton music & lyrics. Filmnya bagus... Gw sedikit tersentuh ama si alex yg cemburu gara2 cenya masi admire co yg jerk n ngehajar co itu...
Hmm... Ternyata setiap jalan yg gw ambil selalu bercabang... Gw jadi bingung. Keep asking myself whether i should confess my feelings to her or not... Haizzz...
Apa yg bakal terjadi kalo dia nolak gw??? Gw takut gw bakal depresi as i was when i liked someone...
No matter wad, let's wait for the time to decide it...
PS: I'm still waiting for you no matter how long it will take...
walking beside you @ 11:15 PM
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
menghitung hari
detik demi detik
menunggu itu kan menjemukan
tapi kusabar
menanti jawabmu
jawab cintamu
jangan kau beri
harapan padaku
seperti ingin tapi tak ingin
yang aku minta
tulus hatimu
bukan pura-pura
jangan pergi dari cintaku
biar saja tetap denganku
biar semua tahu adanya
dirimu memang punyaku
jangan kau beri
harapan padaku
seperti ingin tapi tak ingin
yang aku minta
tulus hatimu
bukan pura-pura
jangan pergi dari cintaku
biar saja tetap denganku
biar semua tahu adanya
dirimu memang punyaku
belum pernah kujatuh cinta
sekeras ini
seperti padamu
jangan sebut aku lelaki
bila tak bisa dapatkan engkau...
jangan sebut aku lelaki...
~Menghitung Hari 2~ by unknown artist
walking beside you @ 10:34 PM
Wad a boring day...
Kemarin seharian di hostel... Suntuk bgt... Pingin blajar,tapi... Kepikiran dia trus... Alhasil gw nongkrong di dpn komputer 8 jam non-stop... Haizzz
Trus sorenya gw ke dokter... Soalnya bagian belakang telinga kiri gw bernanah... Dokternya terpaksa operasi nanah itu... Sakitnya minta ampun... Huhuhu...
Memank kemarin itu hari paling suram gw dalam sejarah hidup gw di sing sampai sekarang...
Hope 2dae will be a better day...
PS: I will keep waiting for u no matter wad...
walking beside you @ 11:02 AM
Sunday, March 11, 2007
Another day has finished...
Tadi siang mugging bareng vi,lia,bohay n tiara... Abiz itu lia pulang... Katanya capek... Trus leonny dtg... Habis itu ke suntec ketemu kemal n hani... Habis itu kita smua pergi ke marina square main pool.... Habis itu pulang...
Kedengarannya sich fun abizz hari ini... Tapi dari tadi ada yg ngeganggu pikiran gw... Hm... Kyknya lagu "i drive myself crazy" cocok buat gw dech... Haizzz... Moga2 bsk pas gw bangun, ga ada yg bakal ngeganggu pikiran gw lagi. Hope so...
PS: I will wait for u forever no matter what...
walking beside you @ 11:22 PM
ooooh....
Lying in your arms
So close together
Didn't know just what I had
Now I toss and turn
Cause I'm without you
How I'm missing you so bad
Where was my head?
Where was my heart?
Now I cry alone in the dark
I lie awake
I drive myself crazy
Drive myself crazy
Thinking of you
Made a mistake
When I let you go baby
I drive myself crazy
Wanting you the way that I do
(wanting you the way that I do)
I was such a fool
I couldn't see it
Just how good you were to me
(Just how good you were to me)
You confessed your love
( You confessed your love)
Undying devotion
I confessed my need to be free
And now I'm left
With all this pain
I've only got myself to blame
I lie awake
I drive myself crazy
Drive myself crazy
Thinking of you
Made a mistake
When I let you go baby
I drive myself crazy
Wanting you the way that I do
(wanting you the way that I do)
Why didn't I know it
(How much I loved you baby)
Why couldn't show it
(If I had only told you)
When I had the chance
Oh I had the chance
oohhhhhh....la la la la la la
I drive myself crazy'
ahhh..oh so crazy
lalalalala...oh oh oh oh
I lie awake
I drive myself crazy
Drive myself crazy
Thinking of you
Made a mistake (made a mistake)
Let you go baby
I drive myself crazy
Wanting you the way that I do
I lie awake
I drive myself crazy
(I drive myself crazy, crazy, crazy...yeah)
Drive myself crazy
Made a mistake
Let you go baby
I drive myself crazy
Wanting you the way that I do
I drive myself crazy
wanting you the way that I do
~ I Drive Myself Crazy ~ by N Sync
walking beside you @ 11:06 PM
Wad a fun day!!!
Gila, hari ini hepi bgt... Siang nonton letters of iwojima ama leonny. Ok sich. Tapi sayang terlalu sadis buat ditonton ama ce. Nvrmind,yg penting morale of the storynya bagus. Huahaha
Habis nonton, kita cabut ke nlb buat mugging... Ga kuat mugging sich,tapi gw merasa berdosa liat si leleng mugging. Terpaksa dech gw mugging juga. Huahaha.
Pas mugging, leonny diajak ama vi main pool. Hahahas, leonny lagi pingin maen pool sich jadi mugging kita terpaksa berhenti. Tapi, bagi gw,itu berkah. Gw ga kuat lagi sebenarnya. Thx Vi, i owe u one...
Tapi sewaktu dari nlb ke lucky plaza,kita ber2 tersesat... Uda salah bus stop trus naek bus 16 tapi ga tau turun di mana. Terpaksa dech kita naek taxi. Huahaha. Kita memank lagi blur2an hari ini,le. Huahahaha...
Ga tau gimana caranya, kita nyampe. Trus ketemu si tiara,vi,kemal n rahardi. Huahahha...
Makan tori'q n old chang kee abiz itu ke lucky maen pool,tapi overcrowded. Akhirnya kita ke marina square... Jumpa henkie di sono...
Trus kita maen pool... Ternyata pool itu asik bgt... Gila, itu kyknya game yg fun abizzz... Tapi gw masi cupu bgt... Le, u mesti ngajarin gw... Huahaha... Tapi seru sich,liat si kemal ngeluarin jurusnya... Huahaha...
Gw mo main pool lagi... Tapi, pasti ga ada yg mo nemenin gw... Sapa ya yg mo nemenin gw????
Hm... Bingung...
Uda ngantuk nich... Bsk mo berenang n mugging lagi... Haizzz...
Ciao
walking beside you @ 1:24 AM
Saturday, March 10, 2007
I heard you're doing okay
But I want you to know
I'm a dick
I'm addicted to you
I can't pretend I don't care
When you don't think about me
Do you think I deserve this?
I tried to make you happy but you left anyway
I'm trying to forget that
I'm addicted to you
But I want it and I need it
I'm addicted to you
Now it's over
Can't forget what you said
And I never wanna do this again
Heartbreaker
Heartbreaker
Heartbreaker
Since the day I met you
And after all we've been through
I'm still a dick
I'm addicted to you
I think you know that it's true
I'd run a thousand miles to get you
Do you think I deserve this?
I tried to make you happy
I did all that I could
Just to keep you
But you left anyway
I'm trying to forget that
I'm addicted to you
But I want it and I need it
I'm addicted to you
Now it's over
Can't forget what you said
And I never wanna do this again
Heartbreaker
Heartbreaker
How long will I be waiting?
Until the end of time
I don't know why I'm still waiting
I can't make you mine
I'm trying to forget that
I'm addicted to you
But I want it and I need it
I'm addicted to you
[x2]
Now it's over
Can't forget what you said
And I never wanna do this again
Heartbreaker
Heartbreaker
I'm addicted to you
Heartbreaker
I'm addicted to you
Heartbreaker
I'm addicted to you
Heartbreaker
I'm addicted to you
Heartbreaker
Addicted- Simple Plan
This song i dedicated to the girl there...
walking beside you @ 10:23 AM
Thursday, March 08, 2007
Wad a happy day...
Tadi penya asik... Main bola!!! n gw ngebully singaporean classmate gw. Huahahaha. Suatu kebanggaan. Hohohoho...
Trus tadi dibagi hasil inggris gw. Gw dapet C5 padahal nilainya 59.2. Huhu... Tinggal 0.8 lagi... Hiks... Gapapa. Ntar midyear harus lebih bgs lagi. Huahaha...
Tadi sore ada cca... Gila,2 jam cuman ngayun tangan gw doankzzz. Skarang tgn gw uda pegel2. Tapi fun. Hwahahaha...
Bsk gw dapat piala gw balek... Huahaha... Gw kangen ama hiasan pingpongnya... Cute abizzz... Hehehe... Moga2 ntar pas national bisa dpt 1 lagi. Wakakaka. Tapi 1 grup ama SJI. Bakalan susah. Tapi harus tetep semangat...
Dah capek nulis blog ah... Saatnya maen game!!!
Ciao
walking beside you @ 9:04 PM
Tuesday, March 06, 2007
Haizzz...
Taid pagi ujian fisika tentang wave. Sucks!!! Susah bgt. Moga2 bisa pass. Huahahaha
Abis pulang,diajak tiara ke orchard. Gw nemenin dia nyari dress yg bakal dia pake hari kamis. Akhirnya stelah keliling wisma atria,takashimaya, n tangs selama 4 jam,akhirnya ketemu juga... Haizzz...Alhasil,skarang gw dah ngantuk berat...
Gw masi sering mikirin dia. Baik di sekolah maupun di hostel. Andaikan gw bisa ngeliat dia lagi. Gw bakalan senang. Di skul, konsentrasi buyar gara2 mikirin dia. Moga2 nilai gw ga jeblok gara2 dia.
Mesti ngerjain pr malay lagi...
Ciao
PS:je reclamer un pres de mon cote
walking beside you @ 9:40 PM
Monday, March 05, 2007
Happy day!!!
Ga tau kenapa hari ini gw hepi bgt. Huehehe...
Tadi ada 4 les pelajaran bio. Dasar si leow. Tetep aja ngebosenin. Mata gw sich ngeliat ke papan tulis. Tapi pikiran gw melayang ke seseorang selama 2 jam. Hohoho. Jadi ga ketiduran. Huahahaha
Prize presentation gw ternyata diundur ke hari jumat. Soalnya anak2 sec 3 lagi pada camp. Alhasil kantin jadi kosong melompong. So gw ga perlu queue lagi. Yey!!!
Kyknya hari ini bakal end dgn cepet. Haizz.. Mesti blajar physics lagi. Sambilan chatting aja ah. Abiz itu makan mie bareng bohay dech kyknya. Huahahaha...
Ciao
walking beside you @ 7:51 PM
Sunday, March 04, 2007
Another tiring week...
Kemarin capek bgt... Ikutan interhostel competition di oldham hall. Gw sich maen futsal sich.
Menang lawan anglican house tapi kalah ama acs(i) tae. OMG. Kenapa gw ga kalah ama hostel lain aja... Haizzz... Tapi gw bangga soalnya gw nyetak gol. GOL BUNUH DIRI!!! Tambah parah lagi...
Akhirnya yg menang si HCIBS alias Hwachong. Untung bukan acsi. Gw dendam kesumat ama acs(i).
Nvrmind,yg penting kemarin gw enjoy bgt... Ada batch 12 dtg... Rhesa,Henkie,Ramses,Yoko... I miss y'all. Trus ngobrol bareng batch. Seru!!! Tapi gw masi bete ama batch. Dunno why...
Trus gw ngeliat yg captain's ball. Hahahas. Gw ngeliat anak mgs yg kecil2 namun bersemangat. Termasuk vi,leleng n vann. Hahahas. Lucu bgt ngeliat ekspresinya si vann waktu kalah.. Sayang gw ga bawa kamera... Wuih... Kpn2 harus diabadikan... Tapi nvrmind, kalian bukan ga ada skill. Tapi, kurang latihan n kesalahan gen kalian doankzzz. Taun depan nyoba lagi!!! Huahaha...
Trus habis itu kita ngerayain ultah putu. Kuenya ada pisang segala... Haizzz. Jadi mirip bgt ama "pip...". hahahas, habis ngerayain kita ke plasing. Beli hadiah rahardi. Drum stick keren ama 1 buku. Habis itu maen arcade. Stelah maen arcade,keliatannya smua org pada capek...
Tapi hari bahagia gw end dgn kejadian yg bikin gw kesal. Tapi nvrmind. Ntar hari bahagia gw jadi hari yg jelek. So let's forget it.
Moga2 tiap hari gw sefun ini. Huehehe. Trus w bahagia ngeliat somebody kemarin. Uda lama ga ketemu. Moga2 bisa ketemu lagi...
Time to go...
Ciao
walking beside you @ 10:42 AM
